You just made me feel so damn special
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
