So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
