he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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