I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
