i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
not ubering you a puppy
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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