no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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