you guys were way drunker than both of me
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
