just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
