Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I need to stop coming to work sober
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
