farters have to be the big spoon...
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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