all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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