I wanna passion pit in your ass
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
They have beer where we have blood.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
