so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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