They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize
