fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
