maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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