she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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