So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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