Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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