Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
