Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
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