If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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