Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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