i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Randomize
