"it" just moved
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
