ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
