She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
