Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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