If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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