Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
They took my balls.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
