apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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