I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
