I hate your face
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
