your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
She even gives head with a lisp.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Randomize
