oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
