where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize