im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
