maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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