What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
