he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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