Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He has the fingertips of a God
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