I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
