U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
