he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
