Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
