It's like God shit irony all over that family
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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