he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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