He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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