My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
