i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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